If Only He Knew

If Only He KnewKelsey Hodge Copyright © 2023 Kelsey HodgeAll rights reservedThe characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.ISBN-13: 9781234567890ISBN-10: 1477123456Cover design by: Art PainterLibrary of Congress Control Number: 2018675309Printed in the United States of America This is for the real Beau and Addy. Thank you for being very special people and inspiring these characters Contents Title PageCopyrightDedicationChapter 1—AddyChapter 2—BeauChapter 3 - AddyChapter 4—BeauChapter 5—AddyChapter 6—BeauChapter 7—AddyChapter 8—BeauChapter 9—AddyChapter 10—BeauChapter 11—AddyChapter 12—BeauChapter 13—AddyChapter 14 – BeauChapter 15 – AddyChapter 16 – BeauChapter 17 – AddyChapter 18 – BeauChapter 19 – AddyChapter 20 – BeauChapter 21 – AddyChapter 22 – BeauChapter 23 – AddyChapter 24 – BeauChapter 25 – AddyChapter 26 – BeauChapter 27 – AddyChapter 28 - BeauChapter 29 – AddyChapter 30 – BeauChapter 31 – AddyChapter 32 – BeauChapter 33 – AddyEpilogue – BeauAcknowledgementAbout The AuthorBooks By This Author Chapter 1—AddyLeaning against the fender of my car, I look over to the man currently bent over underneath the hood of another car, tinkering with something I have no idea about, yet for some reason, he seems to know everything about. Honestly, there really isn’t much point in me having a car. Most of the places I would want to go to in my hometown are within walking distance, but I got one if only for the excuse to bring it here and watch it being worked on.Beau is the best mechanic in the town. Okay, so he’s the only mechanic in town, but he’s still the best. Of course, I might be a little biased, as he is also my best friend and has been for as long as I can remember. Growing up in a small town, everyone knows everyone, but it was in high school that the friendship was sealed, and we haven’t been that far from each other since. Oh, and there’s one other thing.... I’ve been in love with Beau since high school, too, but he doesn’t know this. There is no way you can go up to your best friend and say, “Hey, just thought I’d let you know I love you.” Well, not without ruining the friendship, and that’s not something I am willing to risk.When I had come out to him as gay at sixteen, I thought he was going to run a mile. Who in the hell wants to be the straight guy with a gay best friend? But he just smiled and said it meant there were just more girls for him, and it was never really mentioned after that. It was just accepted, and honestly, it had been great. If we went out anywhere, he would be scoping out guys and asking me if they were hot, and I would do the same for him with the girls we saw. It was fun in some strange way.It became our secret. There was no way I was ready to come out to the school — remember, small town — but it worked, except for the part of my falling in love with him. Beau was the cool kid in school, the one everyone wanted. The girls wanted to date him, and well, the guys wanted to be him. It was so cliché, but Beau didn’t seem to notice. I was sure that some of his friends would have teased him for being friends with me since I was what was called a nerd in high school. I did well in classes, teachers liked me, and in any other school, it would have meant no social life, but being Beau’s friend changed that. I was invited to parties and to hang out. Okay, most of the time I didn’t go, but it was still cool to be with the ‘in’ crowd. This also meant I wasn’t picked on because who was going to mess with Beau's best friend, which made school fun.It’s been like this for years, me admiring him from afar and torturing myself with opportunities. Staring at the curve of his ass as he’s bent over. A noise from the garage brings me back to the now, and looking over, Beau has moved from under the hood to stretch out his back before bending back over and tinkering with the engine again. I thought he hadn’t noticed me until I watch his ass wiggle. Busted.“You know I’ve heard you from the moment you arrived,” Beau says to the engine in front of him.“Is that me or the engine you’re talking to?” I reply, but I’m smiling all the same.“Hope you’re enjoying the view,” he says, wiggling his ass again.Laughter spills from me. Even though Beau has no idea on how I feel about him, he knows he has a nice ass and he also likes to tell me — or show me with a wiggle — as often as he can, thinking it’s a joke, but every time I get so hot under the collar, always going red. Beau thinks I’m embarrassed because he’s my best friend and really don’t think of him in that way, which is why he gets such a kick out of it.“What, your grease covered ass? Yeah, it is a great view,” I fumble out, trying to hide the want from my voice.“There’s no grease on my ass,” Beau protests, jumping up and trying to look behind him, which makes me laugh hard. Beau is smart, but sometimes he’ll do something like this and he reminds me of the cartoon character that races around in circles trying to see their backsides even though they can’t. Beau stops looking and walks over to a broken mirror in the corner and spots the big blob of grease, because yeah, I also hadn’t been