The Frugal Wizard’s Handbook for Surviving Medieval England


 
 
 Table of Contents
 
 Front Endpapers
 Title Page
 CONTENTS
 Dedication
 Acknowledgments
 PART ONE 
 
 Chapter One
 Chapter Two
 Your Own Dimension
 Chapter Three
 Have I Time Traveled?
 Chapter Four
 Chapter Five
 Chapter Six
 Why Do Some Things about My Dimension Contradict the Historical Record?
 Chapter Seven
 Chapter Eight
 What Can I Expect from My Dimension?
 Chapter Nine
 You Are a Wizard
 Chapter Ten
 Part One Marginalia
 
 PART TWO 
 
 Chapter Eleven
 Can I Have a Dimension Full of Talking Bananas?
 Chapter Twelve
 All Right, WHY Can’t I Have a Dimension Full of Talking Bananas?
 Chapter Thirteen
 Chapter Fourteen
 Our Fantastic Packages!
 Chapter Fifteen
 How Can I Be Certain My Personal Wizard Dimension™ Won’t Be Corrupted by Other Visitors?
 Chapter Sixteen
 Chapter Seventeen
 Can I Transfer Things Between Dimensions?
 Chapter Eighteen
 Chapter Nineteen
 Why Does Everyone in Britain Speak Modern English in My Pre-Norman-Conquest Dimension? Shouldn’t That Require an Incredible Alignment of Social and Linguistic Factors That Would Never in a Million Years Align in Such a Convenient Way?
 Chapter Twenty
 Chapter Twenty-One
 Chapter Twenty-Two
 Part Two Marginalia
 
 PART THREE 
 
 How to Be a Wizard
 Chapter Twenty-Three
 Chapter Twenty-Four
 Wait. Did I Just Do a Colonialism?
 Chapter Twenty-Five
 Chapter Twenty-Six
 What If I’m Still Worried about the Ethics of Essentially Colonizing the British Isles, Influencing the Course of History for an Entire People?
 Chapter Twenty-Seven
 Chapter Twenty-Eight
 (New!) Better than True Life Experiences™
 Chapter Twenty-Nine
 Chapter Thirty
 Part Three Marginalia
 
 PART FOUR 
 
 What If I Don’t Like My Dimension? Are Refunds Available?
 Chapter Thirty-One
 Chapter Thirty-Two
 Chapter Thirty-Three
 Chapter Thirty-Four
 Chapter Thirty-Five
 Chapter Thirty-Six
 The Wizard’s Burden
 Chapter Thirty-Seven
 Part Four Marginalia
 
 EPILOGUE
 Postscript
 About the Author
 About the Illustrator
 Also by the Author
 Copyright Page
 Rear Endpapers
 
 Print Page List
 
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 ix
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 THE FRUGAL WIZARD’S HANDBOOK FOR SURVIVING MEDIEVAL ENGLAND
 
 Title Page
 Dedication
 Acknowledgments
 
 Part One: The White Room
 
 Chapter One
 Chapter Two
 Your Own Dimension
 Chapter Three
 FAQ: Have I Time Traveled?
 Chapter Four
 Chapter Five
 Chapter Six
 FAQ: Why Do Some Things About My Dimension Contradict the Historical Record?
 Chapter Seven
 Chapter Eight
 FAQ: What Can I Expect from My Dimension?
 Chapter Nine
 You Are a Wizard
 Chapter Ten
 Part One Marginalia
 
 Part Two: How to Be a Wizard Without Even Trying
 
 Chapter Eleven
 FAQ: Can I Have a Dimension Full of Talking Bananas?
 Chapter Twelve
 FAQ: All Right, WHY Can’t I Have a Dimension Full of Talking Bananas?
 Chapter Thirteen
 Chapter Fourteen
 Our Fantastic Packages!
 Chapter Fifteen
 FAQ: How Can I Be Certain My Personal Wizard Dimension™ Won’t Be Corrupted by Other Visitors?
 Chapter Sixteen
 Chapter Seventeen
 FAQ: Can I Transfer Things Between Dimensions?
 Chapter Eighteen
 Chapter Nineteen
 FAQ: Why Does Everyone in Britain Speak Modern English in My Pre-Norman-Conquest Dimension? Shouldn’t That Require an Incredible Alignment of Social and Linguistic Factors That Would Never in a Million Years Align in Such a Convenient Way?
 Chapter Twenty
 Chapter Twenty-One
 Chapter Twenty-Two
 Part Two Marginalia
 
 Part Three: Bagsworth Ruins Everything (Again)
 
 How to Be a Wizard
 Chapter Twenty-Three
 Chapter Twenty-Four
 FAQ: Wait. Did I Just Do a Colonialism?
 Chapter Twenty-Five
 Chapter Twenty-Six
 FAQ: What If I’m Still Worried About the Ethics of Essentially Colonizing the British Isles, Influencing the Course of History for an Entire People?
 Chapter Twenty-Seven
 Chapter Twenty-Eight
 (New!) Better than True Life™ Experiences
 Chapter Twenty-Nine
 Chapter Thirty
 Part Three Marginalia
 
 Part Four: No Refunds
 
 FAQ: What If I Don’t Like My Dimension? Are Refunds Available?
 Chapter Thirty-One
 Chapter Thirty-Two
 Chapter Thirty-Three
 Chapter Thirty-Four
 Chapter Thirty-Five
 Chapter Thirty-Six
 The Wizard’s Burden
 Chapter Thirty-Seven
 Part