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         Other Books By Chad Morris & Shelly Brown Mustaches for Maddie Squint Willa and the Whale By Chad Morris The Inventor’s Secret:Cragbridge Hall, Book 1  The Avatar Battle:Cragbridge Hall, Book 2  The Impossible Race:Cragbridge Hall, Book 3  By Shelly Brown Ghostsitter   Cover illustration: Garth BrunerBook design © Shadow MountainArt direction: Richard EricksonDesign: Garth BrunerAuthor photograph: Kristi PriceInterior illustrations by Garth Bruner © 2023 Chad Morris and Shelly Brown Morris All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without permission in writing from the publisher, Shadow Mountain Publishing®, at [email protected]. The views expressed are the responsibility of the authors and do not necessarily represent the position of Shadow Mountain Publishing. Visit us at shadowmountain.com All characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data (CIP data on file) ISBN 978-1-63993-053-1 | eISBN 978-1-64933-125-0 (eBook) Printed in the United States of America Lake Book Manufacturing, Inc., Melrose Park, IL 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1   To all the amazing teachers and students at Sam Morgan Elementary, Fairfield Junior High, Davis High School, and throughout the world who made the best of school during the pandemic!    Contents NOT TOILET PAPER COOLER THAN CHEETOS A MODEL IN AN ASTRONAUT HELMET NOT PLASTIC PINK NOT LIKE MONSTER TRUCKS RECOVERY THUNK AUDIENCE I NEEDED A WIN MIDAIR FREE FALL BREAKOUT UNDERCOVER P.E. I COULD DO THIS SENT I KNOW HER GIANT ALIEN SPIDERS RUN UNBELIEVABLE LIKE ME LIKE A SLUG VILLAIN IN A SPACE MOVIE THE FURRIEST AT THE TABLE SKATECOASTER AN IDEA ANNOUNCEMENT TRUTH WHAT IF . . . IN MY BLANKET KEIKO ONE MORE THING HELLO? TWO DANCES REMEMBER THIS DISCOVERY OUT SPRINT FAKE MESSAGES DON’T COME OVER CAN WE TALK? GAME OVER IN PERSON SPOTS TOURNAMENT HEY, MOM NOT BAD Discussion Questions Acknowledgments About the Authors   CHAPTER 1 NOT TOILET PAPER Bradley I definitely didn’t expect the FedEx guy to change my life. Summer was dying, showing all of those I’m-about-to-end signs, like the cheesy back-to-school-with-a-brand-new-look commercials, or stores loading up whole aisles with notebooks and binders. All of my summer plans had already happened, not that I did much. Nobody did too much during the pandemic, but I probably did less than they had. My mom had splurged and bought me a new pair of jeans and a bag of socks. I know, super exciting stuff. I could feel my freedom ticking away so I was dealing with it in the most mature way possible: sitting in my pajamas in my dad’s recliner, eating Kix, and bingeing YouTube videos. Mostly K-pop music videos. But also some movie trailers. And a clip where a toddler tried to eat an ice cream cone, lost his balance, and totally face-planted onto the whole cone. So funny and cute. But sad. But also really funny. And a baby duck that followed a dog. And then some more K-pop videos. It was noon. Don’t judge me. I was mourning my imminent loss of free time and independence. But at least the music was daebak. (That’s a Korean word that means “awesome.”) In the last music video I’d watched, seven girls sang in Korean then bopped into this catchy chorus in English, “Sweet like peaches, strong like steel, want to be with you forever, this love is real.” K-pop helped me through some tough parts of last year. Not only is it amazingly well done, it’s also so positive. It lifted me when not much else did. My favorite group is the Bubble Girls and my ultimate bias is Sooni. The girl has serious moves. I’m an official Boba (Bubble Girls fan) and an unofficial Tumbler (Avalanche fan.) My absolute favorite part of K-pop is the dancing. Incredible. Sometimes I wish I could be in a K-pop group, or a boy band, or whatever, but I’m more a solo artist. Of course, that’s not necessarily by choice. Not sure who I would be able to convince to sing and dance with me; I can’t even get people to sit with me at lunch. I swayed in my chair. I might be the best chair dancer ever. Later, I’ll get up and completely go for it. I’m a big kid—you could say fat. I do. But I can follow their moves, especially Avalanche. Sometimes I dance for a few hours at a time; it’s not like I’ve got anything else to do. I’m a pretty good dancer. At least I think I am. And my mom thinks so too. But it’s not like anyone outside my house would ever see me. You don’t ever see enough people my size in music videos. But maybe someday, when the pandemic goes away, I could go on one of those huge talent shows on TV, and then the meanest of the judges would roll his eyes when he saw me, and the nicest judge would give me a chance. And then the music would come on, and I’d start to move—and everything would change. There would be like a moment of total surprise, because I’m not just good, I’m amazing—then the crowd would go crazy. And I’d get a standing ovation, and one of the judges would slam the button that brings down all the glittery floating things from the ceiling, and I’d be famous overnight. And all the kids from my school would wonder how they hadn’t even realized I exist when I’m that totally awesome. Or maybe they’d slam the button that would release a secret trap door that would drop me into the I-can’t-believe-you-thought-you-had-talent pit of embarrassment. And the video clip of me would go viral and everyone would laugh and wonder how I ever thought I was good. That was more likely. I should probably just stick to dancing