Forever and Ever

Copyright Copyright © 2023 by Eva Simmons All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental. Published by Eva Simmons Editing by Kat Wyeth (Kat’s Literary Services) Proofreading by Ellison Lane (Kat’s Literary Services) Cover Photography by Rafa Catala Cover Model David Bodas Cover Design by Eva Simmons Formatting via Atticus Contents Author's Note Playlist Dedication Prologue October 1. Merry 2. Noah 3. Merry 4. Noah July 5. Merry 6. Noah 7. Merry 8. Noah 9. Noah 10. Merry 11. Merry 12. Noah 13. Noah 14. Merry 15. Merry 16. Noah 17. Noah 18. Merry 19. Noah 20. Merry 21. Noah 22. Merry 23. Merry 24. Noah August 25. Merry 26. Noah 27. Noah 28. Merry 29. Noah 30. Merry 31. Noah 32. Merry 33. Noah 34. Merry 35. Merry Epilogue What's Next? Heart of a Rebel Books By Eva Simmons Acknowledgments About the Author Author's Note The characters in this series are human and flawed, with real struggles, and real triumphs. Hard topics will be discussed with on and off page content that may be sensitive for some readers. Trigger warnings (which contain spoilers) can be found on my website. Playlist Situations – Escape the Fate Keeper – Reignwolf Trauma – NF Self Sabotage – Abe Parker Sorry – Nothing but Thieves Rose Tattoo – Dropkick Murphys Something Loud – Jimmy Eat World Monday – The Regrettes I Think I'm OKAY – Machine Gun Kelly, Yungblud, Travis Barker This is What Falling in Love Feels Like – JVKE Lydia – Highly Suspect Lost in the Moment – NV, Andreas Moss Figures – Jessie Reyez All the Things I Hate About You – Huddy Record Player – Daisy the Great, AJR Anthem of Our Dying Day – Story of the Year Niki Fm – Hawthorne Heights MakeDamnSure – Taking Back Sunday The Death of Peace of Mind – Bad Omens Pain – Jimmy Eat World Put You Through Me – Arrows in Action All I Wanted – Paramore Making All Things New – Aaron Espe All That Really Matters – ILLENIUM, Teddy Swims Hurt for Me – SYML Sparks – Coldplay Hold On – Chord Overstreet Only One – Yellowcard You can find the complete playlist on Spotify. Dedication For love worth holding onto through the messy parts. Prologue Noah Love at first sight is bullshit. Everyone knows this. Even an idiot like me, who has a history of tripping over his heart every chance he gets. Been there. Done that. I learned my lesson and now I’m over that kind of optimistic thinking. At least, I was. Until right now, standing here, scraping my jaw off the floor after witnessing what just walked into my dressing room without knocking. She’s a dark goddess in a black tank top and low-rise dark gray jeans. Her skin is laced in tattoo ink, and she’s sparkling in piercings. She’s by far the most beautiful chick I’ve ever seen, looming in the doorway like a pit of vastness I’d like to swallow me whole. And she’s staring at my hardening cock because I’m one hundred percent buck naked. “Nice dick,” she says, her spiky eyelashes flicking as she looks up at me with a feisty smirk tugging at her bright red lips. I’d like to see what else her sassy mouth is capable of, but I grab my jeans off the chair and slip them on instead. Because I’m a gentleman. At least, until a woman asks me not to be. “You don’t believe in buttons?” she says when I don’t fasten my pants all the way. I reach for the bottle of bourbon sitting on the table and take a healthy sip straight from the bottle. “No point.” I take another drink and relish in the burn of alcohol fresh in my throat. “They’ll be coming off again soon enough anyway.” I wink at her, and the dark goddess rolls her eyes. But not in a way that tells me she’s irritated with my comment, more like unimpressed. Like this is what she expects. After all, I’m the drummer for Enemy Muse, the biggest rock band in the country. This is exactly what she should expect from a guy like me. Her expression proves she’s not naïve. I walk over to a table in the corner and pull a hair band off my wrist to tie my blond hair into a bun on the back of my head. Picking up a razor blade from the table, I scrape together a line of white powder, feeling her eyes on me the whole time. I make three nice little rows guaranteed to send me into a black hole where I don’t need to think about what a fucking mess my life is. “Want some?” I hold a straw out to the hot-as-fuck chick still standing in my doorway, but she shakes her head. “No thanks.” Her eyes narrow the slightest, and I don’t like that she seems like she’s trying to read me. Maybe she’s even judging me, but if so, she doesn’t say shit. I lean over and snort a line up my nose until my brain starts to tingle. The air gets fuzzy, and there’s a slight ringing in my ears, dulling out the voices in my head. Just how I like it. The blurrier my thoughts, the less I have to live with them. “Fuck.” I drop the straw and sit on the couch in hopes it will hold me in place as my body starts to vibrate. The dark goddess doesn’t move as I blink her back into focus. She’s pulsating—or maybe it’s my brain. There’s one of her, then three, then one