Silence Kills


 
 
 Silence Kills
 PRAISE FOR SILENCE KILLS
 “Silence Kills is a love letter to creating significant conversations and authentic influence in how we communicate. Author Scott Harvey captures the power of words in a fun and unique way that made Silence Kills readable, dynamic, and also prescriptive. Scott’s specialized law enforcement background, training, and storytelling creates a roadmap to authentic connection and legacy that lasts.”
 —Clint Pulver, Speaker and Author of I Love it Here
 “Not all professional speakers are good writers, and not all writers can handle themselves on stage. With Silence Kills, Scott has proven himself in both areas. Reading Silence Kills feels like being a part of Scott’s audience at a live event. I highly recommend it!”
 —Grant Baldwin, Author and Founder of The Speaker Lab
 “Silence Kills is a MUST READ for anyone interested in taking their communication skills to the Next Level!”
 —Cliff Ravenscraft, Host of The Cliff Ravenscraft Show and The Mindset Answer Man
 “When Scott taught the concepts in Silence Kills to our leadership team, it helped our company streamline our communication process. Scott’s storytelling is second to none. We will be purchasing copies of Silence Kills for our whole team. I highly recommend you do the same.”
 —Amy Wilkins, President and CEO, Marine Solutions, INC.
 “Most books about communication are either too simplistic or too convoluted to help individuals or teams move the needle towards effective communication. Scott Harvey’s book Silence Kills is neither of these. The concrete strategies in Silence Kills are the WD-40 that you need to reduce friction and increase effectiveness at all levels of your organization. Bonus points? They work in every aspect of your personal life, too.”
 —Diana Alt, Executive Coach and Career Growth Strategist
 “In leading an organization that is spread out across the country, it is critical for us to have good communication. Scott does a masterful job of using his experience in law enforcement to emphasize the critical nature of speaking up. A great reminder of what happens when we don’t speak up and people naturally fill in the blanks with their own conclusions. Highly Recommended!”
 —Ked Frank, Founder and President, Refuge for Women
 “Wow! Silence Kills just moved into my top book recommendations for my coaching clients and friends! Every page kept pulling me to the next! Scott is a masterful storyteller who writes with heart, humor, and a bias toward real application that is absolutely refreshing! I laughed out loud frequently, I teared up 3 times, learned practical tools to break the silence, and feel massively equipped to do better! Do yourself a favor and read Silence Kills now!”
 —Mark Keene, Author and Owner, Transformation Coaching
 “Scott is a genius when it comes to communication! Silence Kills is THE toolkit needed for solving the biggest communication challenges faced by leaders and organizations today—nothing will be left to chance. Read Silence Kills!”
 —James Hilliard, 
 Communication Tacticsto Speak with Confidenceand Build Your Influence
 SCOTT HARVEY
 Hostage Negotiator & Business Communication Coach
 
 NEW YORK
 LONDON • NASHVILLE • MELBOURNE • VANCOUVER
 Silence Kills
 Communication Tactics to Speak with Confidence and Build Your Influence
 © 2023 Scott Harvey, Hostage Negotiator & Business Communication Coach
 All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or other—except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
 Published in New York, New York, by Morgan James Publishing. Morgan James is a trademark of Morgan James, LLC. www.MorganJamesPublishing.com
 Proudly distributed by Ingram Publisher Services.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 ISBN 9781636980157 paperback
 ISBN 9781636980164 ebook
 Library of Congress Control Number:
 2022941952
 Cover & Interior Design by:
 Christopher Kirk
 www.GFSstudio.com
 
 
 
 
 
 Morgan James is a proud partner of Habitat for Humanity Peninsula and Greater Williamsburg. Partners in building since 2006.
 Get involved today! Visit MorganJamesPublishing.com/giving-back
 TABLE OF CONTENTS
 Introduction
 Phase 1: The Problem
 1. Silence
 2. The Brain
 3. Stress
 4. Fear
 Phase 2: The Solution
 5. Rapport
 6. Listening
 7. Kindness & Clarity
 Phase 3: The Tactics
 8. Face-to-Face
 9. Phone
 10. Print
 11. Social Media
 12. Other Media
 The Debrief
 13. Legacy
 Bonus Content
 Acknowledgments
 About the Author
 Notes
 INTRODUCTION
 “ALL CLEAR! Shooter is in custody.” I breathed a sigh of relief as the SWAT commander called across the radio. When the officers finally made entry into the house, they found containers of ammunition staged in the middle of every room and guns squirreled away like some deranged chipmunk storing nuts for the winter. These weapons were ready for him to quickly grab in any room.
 Hours earlier, when the original call came in to dispatch, all we knew was that rounds had been fired from inside the house, penetrating the walls of the next-door neighbors. Shortly after, the SWAT team was en route, including the hostage negotiator. Me.
 The SWAT team set a perimeter to keep the suspect from escaping. While they evacuated the neighbors, I started calling the suspect’s phone. My job, amidst the chaos, was to get him talking. When he picked up the phone, the negotiations started the way they always did. He cussed me and hung up. I called back. He threatened me and hung up. I called back. He threatened my family and hung up. I called back. Eventually, he quit hanging up. I wanted to help him, and it was my job to convince him of this fact. Rapport HAD to be established. That was my main job from the outset.
 After HOURS of asking the right questions, actively listening to his answers—without judgment—as he vented his frustrations and fears, and building